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Weddings at First Unitarian

A typical wedding service

We are glad you are considering us for your wedding. As a member congregation of the Unitarian Universalist Association, we welcome participation by all persons "without regard to race, ethnicity, gender, disability, affectional or sexual orientation, age, language, citizenship status, economic status, or national origin and without requiring adherence to any particular interpretation of religion or to any particular religious belief or creed." We actively support same-sex marriage.

Our church just might be the perfect place for your wedding. Our stone Gothic Revival building was constructed in 1838, and it is capable of holding over five hundred people. The stained glass and the magnificent Tiffany mosaic of the sanctuary make for a beautiful place in which to hold a wedding. The acoustics are excellent, perfect for both music and spoken word.

If you are looking for someone to officiate at your wedding, contact our minister, Rev. Dan Harper. Click here to see a typical wedding service. If you'd like to use your own clergyperson to officiate at your wedding, please check first with Rev. Harper about that possibility.

Our music director, Randy Fayan, would be happy to help you plan music for your wedding. Our Parish House (attached to the church) is a graceful setting for your rehearsal dinner and/or your wedding reception. A full kitchen is available should you need it.

It's always best to plan ahead for your wedding. If you choose to have your wedding here, dates must be confirmed with the church office at least four weeks before the wedding. However, for always recommend that you call further in advance to be sure our minister and/or our building will be available on the date you prefer.

For a full brochure about weddings at First Unitarian, including a fee schedule, contact the church office at 508-994-9686.

Photo of a wedding.

A wedding in our church in 1954. Our church still looks much the same, although the sides of the pews are now off-white, making the church much lighter.

Typical wedding service

Below you'll find a typical wedding service as conducted by First Unitarian's minister, Rev. Dan Harper. This sample wedding service should give you a good idea of what a wedding at First Unitarian might be like. This service is informed by our understanding of feminist theology (i.e., when it comes to religion women are just as important as men), and it is informed by our strong support for equal marriage rights for same sex couples.

This wedding service contains material gathered from many sources. The prayer/meditation is copyrighted by Antoine de St. Exupery, and is included here under fair use provisions of copyright law. All other material is in the public domain to the best of our knowledge. If any copyrighted material is included here in error, please notify First Unitarian so that we may credit the copyright holder or remove the material at the copyright holder's request.

Prelude

The wedding service begins with music, arranged by the couple with our music director.

When the final (or both) members of the couple are ready to process into the church, our music director will begin playing the processional music chosen by the couple.

Opening words

We are gathered here today to recognize and celebrate the marriage of _______ and _______. Marriage is a bold and courageous act, one I know _______ and _______ do not undertake lightly. They are here today only after long and careful reflection. We are privileged to share this joyous event with them today, and our presence is a sign of support for this decision.

The intimate, yet public, nature of this ceremony reminds us that none of us exists in isolation. We are social beings. Our identities, even our very existence, only comes about because our family and friends, the relationships that nurture and define us. It is through community that we call into being the power of love to build bridges of human caring, to make us feel whole, to allow us to feel at home in the universe.

So it is that marriage cannot exist in isolation from family, friends, community. And so it is that I ask you, _____________ [parents or equivalent], do you welcome _______ as a member of your family circle and pledge your support to this new home?

_____________ [parents or equivalent], do you welcome _______ as a member of your family circle and pledge your support to this new home?

And I ask all who are gathered here, do you promise to support _______ and _______ in their new shared life? If so, please answer, "We do."

Prayer/ Meditation

(A different prayer/meditation could be substituted.)

Let us enter into the spirit of prayer and meditation, hearing these words from the poet Antoine de St. Exupery:

In a house which becomes a home, one hands down and another up, the heritage of mind and heart, laughter and tears, musings and deeds.

Love, like a carefully loaded ship, crosses the gulf between the generations. Therefore we do not neglect the ceremonies of our passage:

When we wed and when we die, and when we are blessed with a child; when we depart and when we return, when we plant and when we harvest.

We live not by things but by the meaning of things. It is needful to transmit the passwords from generation to generation.

Readings

Specific to the couple (a packet of suggested readings is available on loan from the First Unitarian office).

Reflection

Specific to the couple. The minister writes this reflection, or homily, after getting to know each couple.

Intention

Now we come to that part of the ceremony where each member of this couple voices their affection for each other, and where they call into being the devotion needed to sustain their marriage in the years ahead. We now engage, -- with our eyes and ears, with our hearts and minds, with our bodies near one another in this place -- we engage in the creation of family.

_______ and _______, it is now time to begin your passage into marriage, by declaring your intent to marry and then by making your vows to one another. You have invited us to share this wedding ceremony with you, and to witness the happiness you have found in each other. We know that the commitment between you is already strong. Are you now ready to begin your passage into marriage?

The couple replies: We are.

Vows

Specific to the couple. A selection of vows is available from the office of First Unitarian, or couples might choose to write their own in cooperation with the minister.

Exchange of rings

May I have _______'s ring, please? [minister holds ring in hand] The circle is the symbol of the sun and the earth and the universe. It is a symbol of holiness and of perfection and of peace. This ring is a symbol of unity, in which your two lives are now joined in one unbroken circle. _______, please place this ring on _______'s finger and repeat after me:

I give you this ring to wear upon your hand as a symbol of our unity.

May I have _______'s ring, please? [minister holds ring in hand] The circle is the symbol of the sun and the earth and the universe. It is a symbol of holiness and of perfection and of peace. This ring is a symbol of unity, in which your two lives are now joined in one unbroken circle. _______, please place this ring on _______'s finger and repeat after me:

I give you this ring to wear upon your hand as a symbol of our unity.

Pronouncement

Inasmuch as _______ and _______ have grown in knowledge and love of one another, because they have agreed in their desire to go forward in life together, seeking an ever richer, deepening relationship, and because they have pledged themselves to meet sorrow and joy as one family, we rejoice to recognize them as joined together in marriage.

Closing words

Tomorrow is unto us as a door to be opened,
as a journey, an adventure.
Tomorrow is a springtime and a harvest-time,
and the grain to be gathered is life,
and the flowers and fruit are harmony and understanding.

Amen.

Postlude

After the closing words, the newly-married couple leave the church while our music director plays recessional music chosen by the couple.

Additional postlude music may be arranged with our music director if desired.

The foyer to the main church does have room for areceiving line, in case of inclement weather.